Finding out the sex of your baby

Whether to find out your baby’s sex before birth — and how — is a fun (and sometimes surprisingly divisive) decision. There’s no right answer: some people love knowing so they can plan and bond, others treasure the surprise at birth. Here’s how and when you can find out in Australia, if you choose to.

The 20-week morphology scan. The most common way people find out is at the 20-week ultrasound, where the sonographer can usually (though not always) see the baby’s genitals. If you want to know, tell them at the start; if you don’t, tell them that too, so they don’t say it by accident. Occasionally the baby’s position makes it hard to tell, so it’s not guaranteed.

NIPT — from about 10 weeks. Non-invasive prenatal testing is a blood test (mainly used to screen for chromosomal conditions) that can also report the baby’s sex from around 10 weeks, earlier than the scan. It’s a paid test in most cases, so there’s a cost, and people often choose it for the screening first, with the sex as a bonus.

Other tests. Diagnostic tests like CVS or amniocentesis also reveal sex, but these are done for medical reasons (not just curiosity), as they carry a small risk. You wouldn’t have them purely to find out the sex.

Accuracy. NIPT and diagnostic tests are highly accurate for sex. The 20-week scan is usually reliable but can occasionally be wrong or inconclusive, depending on the baby’s position and the view — so allow a little room for a surprise even if you’ve been told.

Reasons people love finding out. Some feel it helps them bond, picture their baby, choose a name, plan a nursery, or simply satisfy their curiosity. It can make the pregnancy feel more real, and can help older siblings connect with the idea of a brother or sister.

Reasons people wait. Others find the surprise at birth a wonderful motivator and one of life’s few genuine surprises. Not knowing also sidesteps other people’s opinions and gendered gifts, and some prefer to keep the focus on a healthy baby rather than the sex.

A note on “gender reveals” and expectations. If you do find out, remember a scan or test tells you the baby’s sex, and it’s just one piece of who they’ll become. It’s also okay to feel a flicker of surprise or complicated feelings about the result — that’s normal and doesn’t reflect on how much you’ll love your baby.

Whatever you decide, make it your choice as a couple, and don’t feel pressured either way by family or social media. Knowing or not knowing takes nothing away from meeting your baby — it’s simply whether you’d like this particular surprise now or on the day.